Update..Kaveh's attention

Baradar jan,
I am reading a book that I think you would like. It's beautifully written, and it gives you a very broad taste of a country that we don't know much about: Spain. I came across it very accidentally. Leeza was reading it, and I just picked it up to see what it was. It's irresistible. For someone like me who is not a big fan of historical books, this one is something different. It's not just history. It's everything. It's called "The New Spaniards". I also have a number of attractive books in my cue. (To name a few: Atonement, I, etc., ).
I discovered some new Music too. (Well, other than Namjoo who is still rocking my world). AND, I did net-flix those two movies; will watch them soon and report.

Inside me, there is a volcano. "man khamoosham o oo dar faghaan o dar ghoghaast"...You know how that goes. I think I may be too involved in my psychological development for my own good. Sometimes I feel like I live inside myself, analyze and study all the time. My brain needs to take it easy; But, I sense that some wonderful realizations are coming my way.

I miss home, and you, and the opportunity to talk freely about everything with you. It sucks that you are not here. In fact, I have a mini-you in my head with whom I talk about new shit that comes up! (Or through whose eyes I see and interpret what happens areound me). I have a mini-amoo shari for whom I read poetry out loud at nights; a mini-baba with whom I make jokes about "Afshin Peyrovani". A mini maman to whom I talk and justify my thoughts or emotions. Sometimes, when we talk on the phone, I feel sad that we are out of context of each others' lives. I mean, we both know enough, but then are too removed to be able to see the subtleties. You know what I mean?
In any case, you are part of my everyday routines, somehow. The other day, I was at Poopak's for a dosage of twin therapy!! I was looking at Holden, and all of a sudden I imagined how you would react to seeing him. With your somewhat clumsy half-smile and your gij way of dealing with kids; doing beeb beeb to his nose or something; just like myself.

Anyhow, I want to keep learning and feel better. I want to become the person I have always wanted to be. I know you do too; but somehow, the inertia and KG thing make me not go forward as fast or as much as I'd like to. I think you are in the same predicament; but at least you have your job. Hopefully, I will too. Actually, I have always envied your sense of self reliance, or at least the appearance of it that you carry around; you come across as being much less dependent on others; or perhaps it's my skewed imagination of how men feel? I don't know..I'm trying to be more like you in this respect anyway.
You know what I miss? Torkan Loo sense of humor on your side, and sharing New Yorker cartoons with you on mine.

oh, and I will give two CD's to Agha Pat to bring for you. Arash's and all the Namjoo songs I have. I'm glad you, too, like Namjoo!!!

kisses,
garne